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Старый 10.05.2003, 10:56   #1 
alxkorvin
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Dude will your friend SoW me??

Я не несу ответственности за то, что за время прочтения текста вы пропустите CH turn, или у вас спадет charm, или вас забъет green pc на TZ.
Так же, если у вас есть беременная жена, ей не рекомендуется это читать, если конечно вы не хотите преждевременных родов.

This is an old thread I took from my guild on Quellious... just thought I\'d share it with everyone:

Dude, why won’t your friend SoW me?

I was sitting with some friends in Karnor’s early one morning after a VS Raid. Being a little bored, we decided to power level Fluffy.

I’m no expert about the levels and stats for Shaman pets, but something tells me Fluffy was quite formidable that morning. We had cast FoS, Aego, VoG, Regen, and any other buff we could think of on my pet, and turned her loose on the Drolvargs. Once I got the mobs slowed, Fluffy was chewing through them pretty efficiently.

Suffice it to say, Fluffy had somewhere around 3k hp, 60% haste, 1k+ ac, and the full array of Shaman buffs. (all of this comes into play later)

<The Names of the players have been changed to protect the ….>
<I conveniently ended up with a pet named Jenn>

Bob says, ‘Hail, Jenn’
Bob says, ‘Hail, Jenn’

I turn to see a Barbarian warrior hailing my pet while she’s chewing through a Drolvarg.

Bob says, ‘I need a SoW’

Jenn continues using the Drolvarg for a chew toy, much to my new friend Bob’s displeasure.

Bob says, ‘Hail, Entrйe’
You say, ‘Heya Bob’
Bob says, ‘Dude, why won’t your friend SoW me’

Now I’m curious. I do /who all Bob, and the response comes back as Level 48 Warrior. Now I’m confused, but not one to be in a hurry in the early morning hours I decide to play along.

You say, ‘She’s a little bit busy right now’
Bob says, ‘dude I need a SoW so I can get to Halas.’
You say, ‘I see. That’s quite a long run’
Bob says, ‘yeah, and I don’t want to die in here before I make it to the zone’

Things are coming clear to me now. I get the sense that Bob has recently acquired his new EQ account, and in the process of figuring out the game he’s shown his lack of knowledge. I can only imagine someone’s laughter when they told him Halas could be found in the basement of Karnors Castle.

I’m about to correct him when….

Bob says, ‘dude tell your friend to SoW me NOW I’m in a hurry’
Bob says. “!!!!!”
You say, “#’
Bob says, ‘?’
You say, ‘@’
Bob says, ‘don’t be a jerk’

His attitude now explains why someone would tell him Halas in located in KC. It’s time to have some fun.

You say, ‘Jenn can’t SoW’
Bob says, ‘she’s a druid right I mean druids can be wolves and she’s a wolf’
You say, ‘well not really’
Bob says, ‘dude you’re a jerk, she’s a druid!!!!!!!!’
You say, ‘druids don’t melee that well. She’s a Ranger’

A little misinformation, but what the heck.

Bob says, ‘rangers SUCK LOL’

At this point someone kindly brings us a new doggie to kill just as Fluffy gets done with the one she was working on.

Bob says, ‘rangers can cast SoW right’
You say, ‘They sure can.’
Bob says, ‘Dude tell your friend SoW me!!!’
You say, ‘ok she will when she gets done with this mob’

Had the guy been a little nicer I would have cast SoW on him five minutes earlier, and corrected his information about how to find Halas. Well, maybe not, this is starting to be fun.

Bob sits down and appears to be thinking for a minute about how much better he thinks warriors are than rangers.

Bob says, ‘Jenn what’s your hitpoints dude’

Jenn doesn’t respond, of course.

Bob says, ‘man your friend’s a jerk too!!!!!’
You say, ‘she doesn’t speak much English’
Bob says, ‘oh where’s she from?’
You say, ‘Sebilis’

Well, the level 55 Shaman pet spell does drop there /shrug.

Bob says, ‘oh I knew how to speak some of that once’

It’s at this point that my group fills the chat channel with LOL’s and AFK’s so they can recover from laughing.

Fluffy finishes with the mob, but I’m laughing to hard to address Bob’s issue with needing a SoW. Bob grows impatient.

Bob says, ‘dude SoW me NOW!!!’
You say, ‘she’s oom and needs to med’

I’ve never seen my pet cast a spell, so I have to assume she is oom
/pet sit down - :0

Bob says, ‘man, can’t anyone here SoW me????’
Bob says, ‘can you cast SoW?’
You say, ‘do I look like a druid’
Bob says, ‘no you look like a jerk!!’
You say, ‘hmm…. Guess I can’t cast that then’
Bob says’ ‘that’s it!! I’m going to kill all of you!!!’

He spends a couple of minutes trying to figure out how to attack us. Maybe he has the manual handy because he finally comes back with:

Bob says, ‘how come I can’t duel your friend??’
You say, ‘oh, she can’t accept duels because her D key is missing on her KB. You have to duel me and I can transfer the duel over to her’

Bob has challenged you to a duel to the death!

Now I’m starting to feel a little guilty about all this, but with a clicker cleric sitting next to me I see no harm.

You say, ‘this really isn’t a fair fight’
Bob says, ‘rangers suck dude I’ll kick her *%#!!’
You say, ‘well, she’s pretty buffed. Would you like some buffs to even things out?’
Bob says, ‘sure’

First up, Turgur’s insects (the slow spell we all love so much)

Bob says, ‘what’s that do?’
You say, ‘it makes you hit a little slower, but with the other buffs I’m about to give you you’ll hit hard much harder and miss less’
Bob says, ‘ok cool’

/book 50 – The search for those “really good buffs” begins.
I’m memming spells I haven’t seen in ages.

The full array of crappy shaman buffs begins: Glamour, Dextrous Aura, Inner Fire, Strengthen, Endure Cold-Disease-Magic-Fire, and to top them all off - Spirit of Wolf.

Bob says, ‘I’m SUPERMAN with all these!!!’

I have to remove myself from view of my monitor for a minute to regain my composure.

You say, ‘you ready?’
Bob says, ‘Prepare to die, Jenn!!!’

Fluffy chews through Bob without much trouble – there’s a lot of cussing and text going on here from Bob, but I’ll leave that to your imagination.

We get Bob res’d and, feeling a little guilty, we buff him up quite nicely. He continues to be a complete jerk, but I still can’t let him run into the basement of KC where getting his corpse will be difficult.

You say, ‘I have some bad news about Halas’
Bob says, ‘great, what now’
You say, ‘well, they moved the zone again while you were dead’
Bob says, ‘$#% now what do I do?’
You say, ‘well, they moved Halas to Wakening Lands for the next couple of weeks. If you want, we have a Wizard here who can xloc you to that zone and you can try to find it’
Bob says, ‘ok’

I’m not sure what became of Bob. I had to camp right after that, and I’ve never heard from him again. I can only hope that he learned some manners, and a little more about EQ.

Entrйe
Oracle of Dark Brigade

--- [65 Wizard] Sage Alxkorvin - Karana Server
Старый 11.05.2003, 01:27   #2 
Ponovolk
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Смешно! Только как Боб получил аккаунт с 48 варриором?
Старый 11.05.2003, 03:54   #3 
Taciturn
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Смешно! Только как Боб получил аккаунт с 48 варриором?



да это как раз не вопрос ... тоже тут понадобился чистый акк ... купили за пп ну и новому владельцу захотелсь по серверам попригать ... в итоге нашёлся 45 ранжер с макс всеми скилами для его левела ... а чтоб лук на 45 прокочать ...это не один день ранж атак кликать ...

Exarch Belobrisaja , Stormhammer.


Старый 11.05.2003, 04:18   #4 
Ponovolk
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То есть вместо левелинга ранж аттак качал?
Старый 13.05.2003, 05:33   #5 
Cornet
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вообще-то года эдак 2 с половиной назад была похожая рассказка... дело было в OT, green клоун приставал к визу 55+ насчет порта в FM, и клоуна этого после пары port to bind naked отправили искать FM в OOT по концовке...весьма смешно... по идее где-то в архивах должно быть, если не съел хомяк...

I don\'t like the drugs
but the drugs like me...
M.Manson

Cornet
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